Sometimes we can feel alone, not quite sure where or to whom we truly belong. Frightened and insecure we imagine awful things happening or are consumed with anxiety and doubt.
At times, I have often wondered where one person’s suffering stops and mine starts because I would (and do) soak their pain up like a sponge.
Sometimes we cannot sleep, we cannot unwind, we don't quite feel safe and secure. We worry about what others think of us or what they say about us behind our back. As much as I love living in a small town, I cannot believe the amount of gossip and interest in other peoples’ lives the place generates.
God forbid anyone should put out misleading information, because it becomes ‘fact’ very quickly!
Sometimes we feel as though we cannot trust others or find ourselves trusting others who are not worthy of that trust and we end up feeling abandoned, hurt, disappointed or ashamed.
When doing my best to overcome the ravages of a particularly awful health challenge, I put myself under the influence of some brilliant brain washing called ‘You are not allowed the luxury of a negative thought’, consciously dwelling all day every day on the fact that I would be well.
Along with my potions, these days I use the techniques of self hypnosis after having benefitted from the wisdom of some extraordinary teachers. Removing doubt, removing fear and limiting beliefs.
This type of positivity is important, but I think it can only be reached consistently and become ingrained when healing has taken place to soothe whatever it is that’s caused the pain in the first place.
Nowadays I’ve come to understand that the ‘Inner Mother’ is the Divine Feminine, supreme Yin essence which resides in all of us, male and female alike. It is an energy which needs nourishment, trust, love and security (just the opposite from fear, anxiety and doubt). It resides in our bellies and doesn’t come from any external influences.
I am a witness during these Crone years of my life to many young women beginning their journey into Motherhood in a technical age where the media fills our heads with expectations and judgement about what sort of a ‘good mother’ we are supposed to be.
‘Have we got a flat stomach two weeks after giving birth?’ ‘Have we got a perfect flawless baby who sleeps all the time?’ ‘Are we breast feeding perfectly like we are supposed to because everyone knows breast is best?’
But what if we have an enormous belly, our baby is covered in baby acne and we can’t breast feed no matter how we try?
So, our young Mums who have succumbed to these negative thought patterns are already in a state of depleted energy, even before the months of tiring night feeds and the constant demands of a newborn have set in.
If I were to give any woman a gift on Mother’s Day, it would be to offer a dose of soothing guidance (along with a treatment from myself!) It is time to lay down self-criticisms and judgements of yourselves or others. You are deserving of respect. You don’t have to earn love and affection. It is time to forgive yourself for anything you think you are messing up or doing imperfectly or incorrectly.
We think that becoming a Mother is a question of biology. it is not; it is a question of the heart. At times, I am engaged to help the quest of couples seeking parenthood. Here, deep soul healing is required along with nature's remedies working alongside medical professionals to heal and release whatever the obstacles may be. The ability to ‘love’ and to ‘mother’ begins first with the ability to love and mother ourselves. If we have ever doubted our abilities as parents then we have to embrace trust, feel with our bellies what is right, look in the mirror every morning and say ‘I trust in my inner guidance with love and patience’.
Do not look to others or external influences to feel that you are loved or good enough, you are completely perfect amongst your imperfections.
One of my favourite Meditation teachers is the glorious Jeff Foster. You can find his work here: Life Without a Centre
Keeping our Yin energy nourished is quite easy for females with the use of our supreme flowers and Mother Nature's Gifts. Wallow in the glorious blessing of Rose, Jasmine, Neroli, Ylang-Ylang and Geranium. A flower does not have to move, to be or to do anything to give us the power of pure Yin essence. When breast feeding has ceased, I can’t recommend enough the daily use of a Breast Massage oil. Our Masculine partners can also n